You’ve probably Googled it and if you haven’t Googled it, you’ve certainly still wondered it. Because we all have.
“Are they into me or not?”
But when we do, we run into a slew of problems, because:
Most information out there is really, really stupid.
Signs like: which direction their feet are pointing, whether or not they make eye contact or ask questions or giggle and twirl their hair or whatever.
The problem with “signs” comes down to these two errors:
1. False Positives
Also known as “type I” errors in statistical hypothesis, this is an error in which a result improperly indicates presence of a condition when in reality it is not present. In other words: a “false alarm,” or “boy who cried wolf.”
In the case of attraction, this means:
You think they’re into you, but they’re not.
False positives happens with:
- Friendly or flirtatious people
- People who may be attracted to you but (see below) don’t want to be, or don’t want to pursue anything
- People who give mixed signals
- When your one-way attraction to them overrides any sense or self-awareness you have about accurately reading their behavior
- You get overly hopeful, grasping at things and making small signs indicative of something bigger
- i.e., people who struggle (i.e., fail) to accurately read other people’s signs
2. False Negatives
Also known as “type II” errors in statistical hypothesis, this is an error in which a result improperly indicates presence of a condition when it is not actually present. For example: a medical condition that goes undetected, a guilty suspect acquitted of their crime, or the “silent but deadly”…